How Partners Can Motivate their Men to Live Healthier Lives
When getting healthy a workout partner is good. When staying healthy a life-long partner is great—and you're living with them.
BY LOUIS BEZICH
If you’re a man in a good relationship aspiring to adopt a healthy lifestyle consider yourself lucky. If you’re a partner to such a man know that you’ve got tremendous influence on their health. Experts tell us that it’s our own behavior that has the greatest impact on our health. We also know that social and personal relationships are among the strongest sources of inspiration to live healthy. They represent the endgame, the purpose that drives healthy behavior, keeping many men going when others quit. Yes, the secret sauce of healthy living is right in front of us. The key is to recognize these motivators and turn them into to day-to-day habits, routines and rituals that produce a healthy lifestyle, and that’s where partners can play a key role.
In a nationwide survey I conducted of 1,000 healthy-behaving men over 50, men rated their relationship with their wife or partner as a primary source of motivation for the adoption and maintenance of their behavior. They exhibit what I call Male Cognitive Behavioral Alignment; they connect the dots between their lifestyle and their relationships.
The central premise of my research is that motivation is a prerequisite to a healthy lifestyle. Gym memberships, diets and exercise equipment are all useless unless a man has the motivation to maintain his behavior. What I learned through the survey and subsequent interviews is that healthy living men not only rely on their partners for inspiration, but combine their social aspirations with their health behaviors. How so? They take walks with their partners, share healthy diets and are actively engaged in creating a robust social agenda that constantly replenishes the strong sense of purpose a man needs to sustain his positive behaviors.
So, what specific advice for partners did I discover from the men I studied? Here are 4 basics.
1. Engage in the design of his lifestyle architecture. The foundation of a sustainable healthy lifestyle starts with a detailed examination of where your most valued relationships stand presently, where you want them to be, and how you’re going to get there. The input of a partner in building a man’s social agenda is critical. Jump in all the way on this one.
2. Participate in your partner’s fitness regimen in any way possible. Whether it’s a walk around the block, a 5K race, hitting the gym together or simply offering words of encouragement, being engaged in his fitness routine is a great way to support your man and simultaneously strengthening your relationship.
3. Share and support his healthy diet. Dining is very much a social function. Weaving a healthy diet into your relationship can go a long way to keeping him on track with proper nutrition and get you eating healthy as well. Like fitness, if you can share his dietary practices, that’s great. If its shopping, preparing great meals, or knowing the healthiest take-out sources, that works as well.
4. Help him design and implement a sustainability plan. Getting there is one thing. Staying there is another. Every man needs a sustainability plan that will allow him to navigate the ups and downs of living healthy. Partners can be a great source advice and support when man needs to adjust as they age or simply get pulled off track. Managing a man’s lifestyle, particularly one anchored by his social relationships, requires input and engagement from a wide variety of individuals—a man’s loving constituency. In a larger network a partner can serve as the team captain providing support, but also garnering the assistance of others.
Louis Bezich is Senior Vice President-Strategic Alliances at Cooper University Health Care. He also serves as an adjunct professor in the Graduate Department of Public Policy and Administration at the Camden Campus of Rutgers University. His first book, "Crack The Code: 10 Proven Secrets that Motivate Healthy Behavior and Inspire Fulfillment in Men Over 50" is available now.
|